Comments on: I’m a bad mother after all http://www.themomslant.com/2009/06/im-a-bad-mother-after-all/ I'm speaking for myself Thu, 11 Mar 2010 18:33:48 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: Shelly in Austin http://www.themomslant.com/2009/06/im-a-bad-mother-after-all/comment-page-1/#comment-16975 Shelly in Austin Thu, 25 Jun 2009 19:21:06 +0000 http://www.themomslant.com/?p=2763#comment-16975 I want to second Binkytowne's comment. The people who care for my child during the day are neither strangers nor unqualified. My son's current teacher has a master's degree in early childhood development and has been at our center for 12 years. We are friendly with all of the parents in our class and socialize with probably half of them on a regular basis. My son is an only child and it is very important to us that he have lots of interaction with other children so that he doesn't feel isolated. The comment (not here necessarily) that bothers me the most is that I am "giving" my child to someone else to raise. We have not "given" our child to anyone. We love and nurture him, feed and bathe him, clothe and provide for him. And one of the aspects of that is sending him to school to learn and socialize and interact with a wide variety of children and adults. I want to second Binkytowne’s comment. The people who care for my child during the day are neither strangers nor unqualified. My son’s current teacher has a master’s degree in early childhood development and has been at our center for 12 years. We are friendly with all of the parents in our class and socialize with probably half of them on a regular basis. My son is an only child and it is very important to us that he have lots of interaction with other children so that he doesn’t feel isolated.

The comment (not here necessarily) that bothers me the most is that I am “giving” my child to someone else to raise. We have not “given” our child to anyone. We love and nurture him, feed and bathe him, clothe and provide for him. And one of the aspects of that is sending him to school to learn and socialize and interact with a wide variety of children and adults.

]]> By: Catootes http://www.themomslant.com/2009/06/im-a-bad-mother-after-all/comment-page-1/#comment-16973 Catootes Thu, 25 Jun 2009 16:49:55 +0000 http://www.themomslant.com/?p=2763#comment-16973 Making and owning the choice that is best for each circumstance should eradicate any guilt felt. My husband and I made the choice we felt was best for our kids, our family. A combination of staggered work schedules, which resulted in some lost financial opportunitites for a time, with a mix of willing grandparent care and in-home day care, which gobbled up other financial resources. My own father often made comments about my working and not staying home with the kids yb inferring that it was not the right way. It was our way and I have no regrets. We balance the care of our children, they are richer for the experiences they have had and, as they grow into adults, they will understand about choices and priorities. They are well adjusted, happy kids, whose parents both work outside the home, who have made career sacrifices to spend time with them and be a family. Our choice is just that, our choice. Maybe that makes me a bad mother also, and if so, I'll gladly don that mantle. Dr. Laura and all the others who tell me that the choices I make for my family are wrong, can just kiss my ass or pay my bills while I stay home and make dinner. Making and owning the choice that is best for each circumstance should eradicate any guilt felt. My husband and I made the choice we felt was best for our kids, our family. A combination of staggered work schedules, which resulted in some lost financial opportunitites for a time, with a mix of willing grandparent care and in-home day care, which gobbled up other financial resources.
My own father often made comments about my working and not staying home with the kids yb inferring that it was not the right way. It was our way and I have no regrets.
We balance the care of our children, they are richer for the experiences they have had and, as they grow into adults, they will understand about choices and priorities.
They are well adjusted, happy kids, whose parents both work outside the home, who have made career sacrifices to spend time with them and be a family.
Our choice is just that, our choice. Maybe that makes me a bad mother also, and if so, I’ll gladly don that mantle.
Dr. Laura and all the others who tell me that the choices I make for my family are wrong, can just kiss my ass or pay my bills while I stay home and make dinner.

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